My View from Saturday: Sister Missionaries

Happy Sunday!

We are enjoying the weekend watching general conference. I especially love that today it's rainy and cozy. Perfect for conference.

I've been thinking a lot about the events of yesterday. I was "live tweeting" during conference which I really enjoyed, but I found myself having a lot more to say that twitter's 140 characters would allow. And then I remembered that I have a good old blog that I feel like I have neglected.

Yesterday, the church announced that female members can now serve a mission as early as 19 years old instead of 21, which is pretty big news. I, personally, was not too surprised by the announcement---in my opinion, it's been leading up to this by small steps, including the change in wardrobe of sister missionaries which I think is a big deal, since the thought of wearing frumpy ugly clothes was one of the "cons" of a mission to me ha ha. I myself was ready to go on a mission when I turned 20, and waiting a year was kind of a pain. I do believe that more women will serve LDS missions now, which I'm all for, since my mission was such a definitive part of my life. I don't want to sound boastful, but I really am proud of the fact that I served a mission. It was a big accomplishment for me.

So with that excitement, naturally there is some excitement shared by others that just kind of rubs me the wrong way. There are countless jokes about BYU campus having a girl drought now, and not so joking feminist comments that finally LDS girls will stop get married so young. And countless tweets from women about how they definitely would have gone years ago instead of getting married and immediately birthing children. These are two particular tweets from a couple of pretty popular LDS bloggers (and I should probably mention that neither of these women actually served missions)

"It sets a new narrative for Mormon women. It's no longer if you're not married, then serve. It's go for it!! Love."

"Girls, you can do it all! Go on a mission! Get an education! Have babies! I love this day. No longer an either/or."

.......

BARF.

.......

As a daughter and granddaughter of women who managed to serve missions, get an education, and have many babies, I never EVER was aware that this choice was an "either/or." And you want to know what bothers me the most?? The fact that the LDS church has NEVER made it be an either/or. It's all these LDS women who put that implication on themselves. And then these Mormon feminist women start going off that it's just so unfair that it has been like this for so long. wah wah wah.

I can't stand it. I just don't get it. I wanted to serve a mission, and I never felt that leaving at age 21 was making me an old maid who was risking "having it all." Maybe if the church rule was that girls couldn't serve until age 30, then would I agree to the ridiculous claim that "if you're not married, then you go on a mission." It bugs me so bad.

And just because you change the age limit doesn't mean that every single girl is going to go on a mission now. Missions are not for everyone, and with so many young women, they know that it just isn't for them. AND THAT'S JUST FINE. Why should girls feel pressured now to serve just because of an age change? They shouldn't. I just wish LDS women (particularly the feminists) would stop criticizing and judging each other for the personal choices women have made. I would be lying if I said I wasn't guilty of this. I'm not perfect. But I really try to not do it, because who am I to criticize someone's dream of happiness, even if that means having multiple babies before even reaching the legal drinking age?

A couple of weeks ago, I attended a forum led by the writer/blogger (and writer of one of the above tweets) Joanna Brooks. She is definitely a Mormon feminist, and at some point in the forum q&a, all of a sudden I was hearing multiple young Mormon women complaining about how the church had wronged them, by supposedly implying all they were good for was being a mother. I couldn't believe my ears, because in all my years growing up in the LDS community, I never felt like this. And I genuinely felt sorry for them, that they thought that was such an insult anyway. (you can read more about this discussion on Sarah's blog)  I'm not a mother yet, and it's because I know I'm not quite ready. And I know that it's an even harder thing to do than going on a mission, so I have genuine respect for women who are so ready for it. Because it still scares and intimidates me.

I guess my point in all this ranting, is that women need to back up off each other, and recognize that we are all so completely different. We all make different choices on what's going to make us happy, and as women, we need to support each other all the more. And with all this, I guess I need to remember even more that I believe the religion I take part in is Jesus Christ's perfect gospel. But that certainly doesn't mean that the members of the religion are perfect. So let's just try to be patient with each other, ok? I'm trying, but it's hard sometimes.

And as one final word, if any of you are still wondering or feeling whether the LDS church views women in any lesser form, all you need to do is watch or read this, and that should clear it up. I'm so grateful to know that I am a daughter of God, and I am so grateful to take part in a church that teaches me of this love and of my divine potential. What a blessing and a joy.